I think I am a teenager stuck in a mommy’s body.
You know how teenagers are supposed to have messy rooms with mold growing on a stack of dirty dishes in their bedroom? They are supposed to have wrinkled clothes and an overflowing laundry basket.
Mommies are not supposed to be that way (unless the motherhood and teenage years overlap I guess!). But here I am, a mother in her mid-thirties, and I struggle to not act like a teenager.
I wait until my desk is literally a pile of who knows what to clean it. For weeks, months even, I grit my teeth and push aside piles of crap so I can open my printer drawer just enough to jam some paper in. I think how annoying all the mess is, but do I clean it? Nope. I just get my shit printed, push the garbage back so it doesn’t topple over and add to the floor mess and go about my day.
I just cleaned my desk. It is empty of crap, I have a decorative vase, and some coasters sitting happily upon it because while I don’t like the mess, the clean open space makes me uncomfortable.
Want to take bets on how long it will take me to return to the pile of crap stage? I say it will return to its natural state by October 31st. I can only keep up the appearances of adulthood for so long before the sullen teenager returns.
When is this magical mother halo going to kick in? Maybe when I am in my 40s…or maybe I am cursed (or blessed) with forever being an inner teenager.